9/28/2006
i have never taken anything more seriously than.. well. councillor stuff. i know. i'm not.. councillor type. but fot the first time in my life, i want something so badly, i'd do pretty much anything! even a crumpler didnt excite that much emos in me. am i.. crazy to think this way? i'm tired of being someone else. i wanna get outta my shell and show.. the REAL me. the better me. dont wanna be a girl who doesnt care about anything except ..MH and stuff. i want to care about the real important stuff. not faked up shit. all i ever worked for were for my materialism. its not something you just.. y'know. want to be since you were born. call it a wake up call for me and i'd agree. i've become so.. serious and worried like never before. growin up? yeah. and maturity kickin in? uh huh.
ever wanted something so bad you'd just die if you dont get it? thats how i feel. i had to write a letter to explain why i wanna be a councillor. i did. i think it was ohkay. i stand a 90% chance of getting in. but if she asks ANY of my teachers if i have the right to be student councillor, i'm DEAD. i mean. duh. i distract the class. make silly comments. dont do my work. dont pay attention. which teacher would say "oh yes, kimberly is a very good pupil. please make her a councillor." -_-" yeah. if you're sarcastic. sigh sigh. suddenly i feel more sensible and guai kia. the realisation of the fact that i may not be a councillor is freaking......................... ohkay. no words to describe. it's just driving me more crazy. in the bad way now. UGH!! i want this so so so so so so so so much!!
cherilyn. you stand a 100% better chance of getting selected. all the best. i pray/wish/hope i wont strangle you when you get chosen and i dont. frens should be happy for each other even when they want something and dont get it and their good fren gets it. easier said than done. but i'll try my best. from now onwards, i'll do something i've never done in my entire life. study. listen in class. yupps. i'll do it. too late? it is. my case is too bad beyond reason..wish me all the best with whatever i'm gonna do to myself when i really dont get chosen. results tomorrow. the chances of me becoming a councillor? 2%. i hate myself.
thanks cherilyn for making me feel slightly better. but i feel pretty low right now. crushed. thanks anyways. i love you, girl. (as a fren.) i really appreciate you tryna make me feel like i'll be chosen and by sacrificing ya self by saying "aiya you sure get chosen de. me? no way!" it helped. a TEENY, minute bit. 2 over a 1000. i feel 2/1000 better. 999? worse. i hate myself and my life.
3:12 AM you know you want to ♥;
&; yours truly
name's KIMBERLY and i've got attitude like no other
love me, hate me,
don't care.
what i blog may or may not be true.
it's your choice to believe me or not.
i dont care anyways.
if you're here to check up on what i think about you,
dont waste your time.
especially you,
hacker.
dont like what you read?
too bad. aint my problem.
&; thanks
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